12.1.10

Adoration, Devotion and Frustration

Adoration. Devotion. Strong, heavy words on their own but in the context of my walk with God, even heavier. Do I really adhere to the strength of these words? Do I really adore Him? Am I really devoted to Him?

When I think of these words, my mind immediately wanders to the writers of the old hymns. Seems to me they had a much better understanding of adoration and devotion. The dictionary defines adoration as an act of worship and profound love or regard*. Devotion is defined as
ardent, often selfless affection and dedication, as to a person or principle and is a synonym for love*. I have to be honest with myself, realizing that I know I don't live like that for my God. It is where I would like to be but I am nowhere near there...yet. There are countless songs of worship over the years that use these very words. Sure, it sounds really good to sing about adoring and being devoted to God but I have to wonder if we don't use such words a bit too flippantly...I know I do. I have not delved into the depths of God long enough and deep enough to be able to say that I do adore Him and am wholly devoted. Adoration and devotion require sacrifice. Have I put myself on the altar of sacrifice? Will I be able to do so wholeheartedly? My desire is to be overwhelmed with adoration and devotion for the God who created me to be His friend. It is causing me to struggle with letting go of the things I use as distraction and that is causing me frustration. I am frustrated with myself for not being further than I think I should by now. I could go one of two ways with my frustration:
1) I could just stay there and wallow in my frustration and not do anything proactive or
2) I could recognize that yes, I am frustrated about my current spiritual locale and use the momentum of the need to do something and do something.
I once heard a speaker say that he really likes frustrated people because he can do something with them; they're ready for change, they're not satisfied with the way things are, they want to be proactive.

My concluding thought is simply that I choose not to spend my time in self-wallowing but start where I am and work on perfecting the few things I have figured out and allow God to work out the rest as I spend more time hanging out with Him. I can only adore and be devoted to Him if I truly know Him. In my thinking through this issue, I was reminded of a quote from the movie The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring the elf queen, Galadriel says of the hobbit's mission to destroy the one ring, "All is not lost, there is yet still hope."

*Definitions acquired from thefreedicitionary.com

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